Guilty.
3 a.m., after an enjoyable late-night chat session. A seemingly nice end to a nice Saturday night. All around me is darkness, and silence, but for the constant whirring of the ceiling fan. I retire to bed with a happy sigh. But in a split second things can change ever so drastically.
The flashbacks. The pangs.
It's been two months.
I am guilty of letting these things take hold of me. Control me, instead of me controlling them. I am guilty of a broken heart and a mind unable to forget, to let go of the regret. Guilty of bearing a load of emotional baggage that I cannot seem to lose.
But don't get me wrong. I don't want to go back there again. None of it was worth any of this.
The flashbacks. The pangs.
It's been two months.
I am guilty of letting these things take hold of me. Control me, instead of me controlling them. I am guilty of a broken heart and a mind unable to forget, to let go of the regret. Guilty of bearing a load of emotional baggage that I cannot seem to lose.
But don't get me wrong. I don't want to go back there again. None of it was worth any of this.
Labels: heartmatters
posted by may at 1:58 PM
7 Comments:
*long, big hug*
-j.wo-
*stands a few feet away, as always*
*not stalker-like though*
=P
im fine people, im fine! lol! just one of those moments. come back here alan! lol. and a biiiiig huggie for j.wo (=
hahahaha
take care ya!
-grandmommy-
lol= good to hear u'll be alright
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